this year.....
i want the "little" back in Christmas....
tiny crystal lights strung together like a chain
of softly uttered prayers
offered humbly
over the top of this cluttered world.
just a simple white rosary of lights,
that no one puts away when the holidays are over.
little.......like the moment
when all the crowded cost co isles slipped from view,
as I heard an older couple
singing familiar Christmas carols on a karaoke machine.
soft and reverent, their paper thin voices rained over the sound system
as gently and fragile as an unexpected snow.
suddenly i was five,
sitting in church between my brother and parents,
as the voices of these elders broke my heart
in the way
you want your heart to be broken.
little, like the footsteps of my son
sneaking up the stairs way too early on Christmas morning,
when the sheer delight of possibilities were enough
to take his breath away.
and that hopeful note he left for Santa
beside a generous plate of still warm gingerbread cookies.
Dear Santa,
Please share the cookies with your reindeer.
And could you please find
the missing key to my treasure chest and leave it under our Christmas
tree so I know you are real?
Love,
Adrian
i remember
when a tiny brass key
hardly the size of the first snow flakes of winter
could keep the magic of believing alive;
and the long night i spent desperately searching.
as fate would have it, it found me.
i placed the key on the plate
beside a few less cookies.
in the morning it was adrian's first destination,
he gripped believing in wonder and relief.
i don't remember how many years passed
until i knelt before that old trunk my grandmother
had given to me when i was a child....
and more years later,
i to him.
S l o w l y
i placed that sliver of believing in the old lock
and gave it a careful turn.
it was a hot summer day and what met me was the faint,
perfect scent of Christmas.
stacked to the top...
paper dry and silently waiting;
a humble collection of frail little branches
retrieved from each hallowed pine of all our holidays together.
always the last vestige of Christmas
to be taken down and
adrian's most difficult to release.
carefully
without notice;
he had kept a remnant of each beloved tree.
may the smallest most tender
memories of Christmas
tie our hearts to both seen and unseen miracles.
may all the disparate shards of life knit themselves together
beneath a pure blanket of snow
forgiving all our short comings and delivering us
to a new year of believing.
and just for a few white hours,
before scads of new sleds and brightly bundled kids
weave their spirited footsteps across the soft horizon,
may our hearts be bright.
may our world be transformed.
may some small forgotten memory
fill each heart with a surge of love, wonder, and believing;
that no one puts away when the holidays are over.
xoxoxox
You are a gift to this world x
Posted by: Vanessa | December 24, 2014 at 01:11 PM
Oh, what a wonderful Christmas story, dear Rebecca. Perfectly precious memories. I hope that you and Billy and Adrian and your mother are enjoying a wonderful holiday season. Stay warm and well! Love, Laurie
Posted by: Laurie Zuckerman | December 24, 2014 at 02:45 PM
lovely Rebecca...so bright and heartfelt. Merry Merry Christmas dear friend!
x....x
Posted by: Stephanie | December 24, 2014 at 04:43 PM
Rebecca, your words fill my heart with joy. Thank you for that. I stopped by to say Merry Christmas to you and your and may your New Year be joyous and healthy. I hope you are well. ::hugs:: Gloria (I think of you and your beautiful blog at times, and when I do, I feel anew.)
Posted by: gloria | December 24, 2014 at 04:47 PM
You are so beautiful, you move my heart...your son, so precious...you, your spirit, your heart so open...opening mine...Orly
Posted by: Orly | December 25, 2014 at 01:25 AM
Oh you take my breath away...blessed little christmas to you...xo
Posted by: jean | December 25, 2014 at 07:03 AM
to have a memory
and a way with words
like you do...
what a gift
you have given us,
xoxoxoxo
Posted by: priti.lisa | December 25, 2014 at 09:04 AM
Rebecca dear, what a precious memory of wonder, tenderness and love you've shared. thank you.
Posted by: Laura Hegfield | December 26, 2014 at 07:19 AM
I am always awakened to the surge of love when I read your words over again, like at the sight of fresh snow my heart always leaps at the thought of you dear one....Hugs from over the ocean. x
Posted by: Susan Fox | December 26, 2014 at 07:27 AM
Beautiful story Rebecca.
Feliz Navidad, to you and your family.
Adriana
Posted by: Adriana Esqueda | December 26, 2014 at 12:48 PM
So glad I was able to see this Facebook post--it was magical. Your son is such a good looking man, by the way.
Posted by: Fran aka Redondowriter | December 26, 2014 at 11:17 PM