night claimed us. my mother beside me on the rock hard bed. i moistened the soft rose petal from the sanctuary of juan diego and pressed it directly to my heart. lying on my back towards the night sky, i wondered how many prayers lay imprinted like constellations of devotion in the thick adobe ceiling above us, counting them, following them like endless strands of rosary beads i fell from all references of soul navigation into a deep deep sleep.
somewhere in that dark night she came to me. she walked, no....glided from the far corner of the room towards... me. there was no sound, just a perfect awareness of light. a beautiful calm and heart stirring light. that is what reached me first, her radiant light glowing from ever pore as if she had swallowed the moon, and somehow i was now moving towards her. she beckoned me without words, just that pure light and immediate comfort that radiated from her eyes, heart, hands. yes, we glided toward each other, seamlessly, our eyes drinking each other in until our hands met. i was completely eclipsed in her radiant light. my hands in her hands, opened palmed, we stood drinking each other in. the deeper i fell into her eyes peace grew. compassion slipped from her continence into mine. we stood there filling the dark cell with so much perfect light, i was sure we would wake my mother.
there were no words, yet perfect understanding. i closed my eyes to humbly take her in. she filled me, awakened me, cell by cell. like a blooming, each flush of love stirred and filled one cell then the next. heated with a great loving warmth that grew slowly into my hands, wrists, up my arms...traveling with a resounding urgency to flood my heart.
and in this healing embrace she nurtured every particle of my being assuring me that she would fill my every need, lift my every care, take me in, all of me, the perfect and frail, the whole and the broken, the transcended and the trespassed. transported to a place of complete and utter acceptance, forgiveness, compassion, union. and for this passing of time i was complete and holy in her lovelight. i did not know where my heart ended and hers began. when i opened my eyes, her love had entered me so completely that my hands, arms, the trail to my heart, had turned a lovely cinnamon brown, the colour of mexico, her people, her warm nurturing earth brown skin.
i had brown skin, a rose petal on my heart, was holding hands and looking into the eyes of pure compassion when i heard her say, without speaking, recuerda mi corazon....remember my heart.
